Question

[make_your_move]

reposted from archway with permission.


In a large number of ways, I find LESS emotional risk in sex than in demonstrating and receiving romance .

It takes more courage to offer tokens of time, silliness, thoughtfulness, and affection than it does to indulge in lust.

This makes me curious. It also makes me want to man the torpedoes and address the issue!

The other half of this little conundrum is the courage of the receiver.

If you are poly, where does romance stand in the web of consideration for you, your partner, your secondaries, etc.?

I am curious to any thoughts on this/these topics.

Comments

[puppy-no.livejournal.com]

It's extremely important for me to have a partner who will accept romantic gestures, no matter how gooshy they get, and not be uneasy with them. It's natural to be uneasy because in traditional or vanilla relationships, in the beginning these gestures can stand in for actual communication, and accepting romance can be misread as accepting some sort of love or commitment. I need to just discuss emotional boundaries in a poly relationship, keep checking in on them, and be myself when it comes to being romantic (which is usually excessively so). I do not need it reciprocated, as I tend to be attracted to people who are not naturally "huggy," but I do need it to be accepted and welcomed. Otherwise, I feel inhibited, cautious, and not myself.